Re-Working Your Break-Up

When you are faced with problems in your relationship, it would be easy to walk away and let it fail, while it is harder to stay and work it through. When you are faced with these issues, to keep it in perspective, think of the way you felt when you first met and the reason you fell in love. Remember the good and the bad times you shared, and what makes it worth it.

You know that it takes two to tango, and this applies to your relationship as well. An effort from only one party is not going to prove to be successful.

Many relationships fail for a number of reasons here are a few of the common ones:

· High expectations generally happen when entering a relationship viewing everything through rose-colored glasses/spectacles. When these expectations are not met disappointment and frustration soon follow.

· Financial issues are not taboo between couples. A household budget should be discussed early so you know what is expected of you. It is important to speak up about money issues when they first arise, and not scream about it when you both are angry.

· Manage your stress. Recognize what stresses you both out and do whatever you can to not fall prey. Too much stress can hamper one’s ability to think and respond properly.

· Compromise and do things as a couple. Go to a football match with him and take her shopping, or go on holiday together. Don’t be afraid to speak up and tell your significant other what you want and need. No offence to you guys, but you don’t take hints well, so learn to LISTEN, not just hear! Part of listening also involves not get defensive when she speaks to you, be genuine, compassionate, understanding and sincere.

· Spice up your relationship and go out and have a night on the town together. Bring home flowers and chocolates for no particular reason. Apologize if you have done something to upset her, and surprise her with something that she’s been wanting but do it for “no reason whatsoever” not because it’s her birthday or Valentine’s day.

Both of you have to be willing to make this relationship work. Don’t scream, argue and curse, rather sit down, call a meeting and be reasonable and logical about it. Try not to get too emotional, speak calmly when you say what you have to say.

There are an abundance of tips that can save your relationship, but like with all advice, it may not work in all situations. An understanding of your partner and what your relationship requires can provide you with what you need.

About The Author:
Oprah Love Expert Michael Webb is the founder of "Getting Her Back... for Good" and has taught 1000s of men all over the world how to recover their lost love. He details his steps and valuable advice at Getting Her Back.

Got dumped but want her back? what's the best way to get your ex back?

Looking Into The Mirror Of Your Relationship

Everyone, sometime in their life has been disappointed in love. Breaking up is hard to go through, especially if you are not ready for it. If, after a breakup, you realize you still want your ex back, you need to be proactive about it. In order to do so, you need to reflect back on your relationship and try and understand where it went wrong.

Generally speaking, most relationships follow a predictable pattern. There is the honeymoon period where you first meet someone and everything is wonderful and new. They can do no wrong and you can do no wrong in their eyes. The sex is fantastic, the chemistry electric but after while, this starts to feel more comfortable rather than exciting. You start to adjust to one another, make compromises, and at this point, the relationship changes again. I call this the “establishment” period. At this point, cohabitation often occurs, a little “nesting” starts to rear its head and “she” and “he” become “we”.

A little further down the line comes the “disenchantment” stage where suddenly the little quirks that amused you and you were willing to overlook now start to bother you and in fact, often become the “bone of contention” as a means to “pick a fight”. This is the true test of a relationship and it is this particular phase of the relationship that you need to reflect upon. If you believe you can save your relationship after this deep reflection then you need to do the following:

1. Apologize!

So many “fools of love” out there say, “treat em mean, keeps em keen” and they are so far off the beaten track that they will never find their way on the path to true love. It takes strength of character and great sacrifice to apologize particularly if you do not believe you were in the wrong. However, sometimes it really is worth “losing a battle to win a war”. Once you have taken this first step, the rest is not that difficult to follow. Remember, it takes two people to have a successful relationship and knowing exactly what to apologize for is crucial.

2. Talking things through, face to face

Invite your ex to meet you at a time and place convenient for you both where you can sit down and talk. The idea is to be quietly assertive, not forceful, but intent enough to get her to agree to meet you face to face. You both need to chat about the issues objectively, without blame and maturely. If necessary, suggest couple counseling with a therapist so she can see that you are serious in your quest.

3. Give her some time and space – don’t pressurize her

This is probably one of the hardest things to do but by allowing your ex space not only gives her a chance to calm down and reflect, but also to miss you and it is true that as time passes, one only remembers the good times. By allowing a little time to pass, takes the heat of the anger out of the equation and emotions to settle into places of calm. This can only work in your favor.

4. Treat her like a lady

This doesn’t necessarily mean that you need to take her on a triple Treat of Champagne Breakfast, Balloon and Boat Ride but it does mean you need to do things differently! She is the most important person on earth to you; show her this in your actions, not only in your words!

About The Author:
Oprah Love Expert Michael Webb is the founder of "Getting Her Back... for Good" and has taught 1000s of men all over the world how to recover their lost love. He details his steps and valuable advice at Getting Her Back

Does wanting her back seem hopeless? What is the best way to get her back?

Re-Invent Yourself

You’ve broken up with your ex and are either single or with someone new but you know you jumped back into the dating pool too soon. You realize this was a rebound knee-jerk reaction and what’s worse, you can’t get your ex out of your mind. You want her back and you want her back for good! Stick around because not only will I tell you how you can get her back, but how you can improve on your own life and self-image at the same time.

We all know men and women are wired differently – “Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus right?”. But what if you could rewire yourself, both physically as well as emotionally! You can and whilst you may not wake up tomorrow a totally new person both physically and emotionally (believe me it doesn’t even happen overnight on those reality television shows), the first step in reinventing yourself to win her back is to START living the life you want to live and being the person you and SHE want you to be.

It can’t be that difficult or too far a reach or disconnect or else she wouldn’t have dated you in the first place right? We are all primed from early childhood, allocated labels, “athletic”, “academic”, “artistic” etc but often these labels are self-fulfilling prophecies that create our identity as opposed to shaping our identity.

Despite the fact that your breakup with your ex might have been the catalyst for your desire to change, self-actualization, or becoming who you need to be is part of life’s evolution. With evolution, your needs change, you acquire wisdom and experience and now you have reached a stage where you need to try something different. You may want to explore a new career, move to a different location, explore other activities and behaviors. In fact, this could also be the reason your relationship with your ex back-fired. Neither of you were getting what you needed. Perhaps she felt unappreciated or bored, and perhaps you found excuses to be away from home. However, the breakup between the two of you is treating the symptom, not the cause.

Take the next couple of days to make a list of all the positive and negative factors in your relationship but at the same time, look after yourself by eating healthily, exercising and getting enough sleep. This time apart allows you to reassess your life, and your possible life together with your ex, objectively. By the time you meet up with your ex she will already begin to see the ‘new emerging you’; and might possibly be inspired to join you. Whatever the situation, it is important to remember that you’re not stuck with who you were in the past. We often feel like who or what we aspire to be has to "make sense." But we're always growing, and taking a leap into a new life is exciting and even better with your ex by your side. It starts off as small steps and it was Confucius who said: “A journey of a thousand miles starts with the first step,” and so to reinvent yourself and your relationship, it’s often the little things that are the first step.

About The Author:
Oprah Love Expert Michael Webb is the founder of "Getting Her Back... for Good" and has taught 1000s of men all over the world how to recover their lost love. He details his steps and valuable advice at Getting Her Back

How To Use Body Languge To Show Interest

Neither a lofty degree of intelligence nor imagination
nor both together go to the making of genius.
Love, love, love, that is the soul of genius.
Mozart

We all know that if you wink at someone you’re sending them a signal that says you’re interested in them. Granted, most of us aren’t comfortable being quite that forward with a perfect stranger, but there are more subtle ways of showing interest by using body language.

It can be difficult when you are in a crowded bar or even at the grocery store to know if the person you find attractive is available, must less interested. However, with just a few small moves you can send them a signal that says you are open to getting to know them better.

Here are a few fun examples:
Running your hand through your hair. When a woman runs her hand through her hair, she is giving off a subtle signal that she is receptive. The reason for this is because when a woman pulls her hair away from her shoulders or her chest she is revealing more of herself to the man who has caught her eye.

Licking your lips. When a woman licks her lips or applies lipstick, she is drawing attention to her mouth. Because a woman’s mouth is a very sensual part of her body, a man is sure to take notice and will feel drawn to her.

Crossing the legs. Men absolutely love legs, and when a woman slowly crosses or uncrosses her legs, it catches a man’s attention. It’s a flirty move that is sure to get noticed, probably by more men than just the one she is trying to show interest in.

Smiling. Even something as simple as smiling is a form of body language. It shows that you are friendly and approachable. If you are interested in a man in the room, smiling at him will surely get his attention.

Looking directly into his eyes. Eye contact is one of the strongest forms of body language. When a woman looks into a man’s eyes, even before they have spoken, she is telling him that she’s not only comfortable with herself, but that she is very comfortable with him as well. Men love a strong woman and when a woman takes the initiative and makes eye contact, the man is much more likely to approach her.

Body language can be the difference between catching the eye of the man who has caught your attention or him wandering towards another person. Every woman should feel comfortable in her own skin and in using her feminine wiles to entice a man she finds intriguing. With just a few simple movements, a woman can show a man that his approaches are more than welcomed.

The first step is smiling and making eye contact, and after that, it is all up to you. Using body language to show your interest is a smart and effective way of breaking the ice. If you’re single and you see someone appealing, give it a try. You may just be surprised at how well those subtle movements work.

Time For Tantra

Whilst ‘make up sex’ can be exciting, exhilarating, passionate and QUICK, it’s hardly going to be the glue that keeps her by your side or keep you two together. Hard, fast, thrusting is good, but not feasible in the long-term for obvious reasons! This is where Tantric sex comes in. In Tantric sex there is no goal of getting anywhere, of striving for the big “0”. Your approach with your partner is all about awareness and feeling, experiencing the “now”, with your ego dissolving and your heart opening. It’s a form of meditation that lets history dissolve, resentment fade away and anger turn into joy. It’s just what you need to get her back!

However, Tantric takes practice and it takes 2! So you have to convince her to take this journey with you and once you have both gone down this path, there will be no turning back. It’s not some huge mystery as most people seem to think and neither do you have to wait until you know it all. Every little step you take in this direction brings its own rewards and on this journey, you get to know yourself intimately first and then that of your partner, by exploring first the physical, the emotional and finally the spiritual.

If you explain this procedure to your ex, she is going to be spell bound and most definitely curious. Inviting you ex to your home to try out Tantra, requires her trust in you so don’t blow it! The first thing you need to do is design an “intimacy space”. Start off slow with a light intimate dinner and then proceed to this “space” which should be comfortable, relaxed and clear of clutter. It needs to be decorated with flowers, candles and cozy fabrics and the additional ambience created by the scent should be of natural oils like jasmine, ylang-ylang, or rose. Choose a soundtrack of music that you both like to be played as soft background music.

The next step is intimate and involves breathing each other’s breath. Harmonizing your breath is one of the easiest ways to sync with your partner. Straddle your partner’s lap (called the yab-yom position) and inhale while they exhale and vice versa. As your partner breathes out, you’ll find yourself taking their breath into and down through your entire body. As you exhale, consciously attempt to energize the breath. In this way, you’re sharing all of yourself with your partner. Whatever you do, do not lose control – this is critical!

Take it Slow!!! Foreplay is essential in Tantra. A slow build will not only help you maintain your erection but it will intensify her arousal. The longer you linger in this process of building energy, the longer your session will last and the more energy you will build. Use this time to fully focus on each other. As in meditation, when your thoughts wander, gently guide your attention back to your partner and the magic of the moment at hand.

Whilst all this erotic foreplay is building, maintaining eye contact is essential. You are going to make love with your eyes open as the ultimate display of your deep connection with your ex and the level of your intimacy. It will be a challenge particularly as the sensations of pleasure heighten. When the two of you finally make love, you’ll find the love making profoundly transformative and move each other in ways you could never imagine. You will have no need to worry as to whether she would accept your second invitation to “dinner”.

About The Author:
Oprah Love Expert Michael Webb is the founder of "Getting Her Back... for Good" and has taught 1000s of men all over the world how to recover their lost love. He details his steps and valuable advice at Getting Her Back.

Getting Her Back… For Good is NOT about shallow manipulation or obvious trickery. Rather, this book teaches you how to become a better YOU so she'll want you back

Welcome My Darling

Her naked, curvaceous body stirred. Raising her arms above her head, smiling, she slowly opened her eyes, oblivious for a slight moment where she was exactly, stretching languorously. Turning over her shoulder, she sees him.

He is still sleeping peacefully, and she is pleasantly aware of a slight grin. He must be dreaming she thinks to herself, slowly swiveling her legs over the edge and heading for the bathroom.

As shes splashes the cool water over her face, she gets flashes of their first encounter, last night. It’s the first time he has shared her bed, and let him indulge her. She still feels the tingling pulsating thru her body as she allows these hot thoughts to run thru her mind. The build-up, the urgency, the passion, they had been lovers for months before he couldn’t stand it any longer and begged her to meet.

He turned up at her door, smiling, holding his arms out, as she instantly fell into them, kissing him, feeling him. They both knew what they were there for, no words needed. The electricity in the air seem to sizzle as they locked eyes, unable to contain themselves as they were invisibly drawn to the huge bathroom.

Welcome my darling she mumbled under his rough kisses, which covered her everywhere, slowly peeling off her tiny tee and shorts, and hoisting her up to the bench where he had better access to her delectable curvaceous body.. She spread open for him, her drenched thighs exciting him. Positioning himself between, he cradled her ample breasts in his hands and licked her erected nipples. Watching intently for her reaction as he began to suck her boobs into his mouth, softly nipping, squeezing, letting out soft moans into his ear. Her thighs spread open wider, her lower body rocking from his touch. Grabbing his chin, she drew closer planting wet, desperate kisses on his lips, parting his and exploring his eager tongue. He reached down to find her rigid clit pulsating, her wetness soaking his fingers, as he began rubbing her steamy folds.

Oh baby, I want you to taste and devour my pussy she whispered, licking his lips as if to show him the way she liked it. He didn’t hesitate. Lowering his kisses to her neck and back to her breasts, he continued kissing his way down to her navel, finally reaching her hotspot, prolonging the aching by nipping and licking his way all along her trembling inner thighs.

Instantly, she arched her back, her moans increasing, as he teased and licked her everywhere but there till she couldn’t stand it any longer, guiding his face to her throbbing mound and pushing his wet lips onto her. He took her delish love button gingerly into his mouth and began to suck and play with it, thrilling her, deep moans of pleasure escaping her lips, alternatively sliding his fingers into her moist slit, as she gyrated and writhed, wrapping her silky thighs around his neck, watching him feasting opulently and greedily.

With precision, he licked her good, up and down, all around, inside and out, her soaked cunt building up to the most anticipated amazing orgasm, how she longed for his touch, and now that he was finally with her, she was going to explode into his open mouth, and wanted him to lap it up, drink her, show his enthusiasm and lust for her.

The moment was now, as he drove his tongue deep into her tightness, his finger on her quivering clit, the wave rising, lost in sensation, as it came crashing, ripples of intense pleasure tingling her entire being, squeezing her thighs around him, crying out his name, rocking with him, over and over, her body heaving, then finally subsiding. Her spasms apparent, holding her pussy lips wide, allowing him to savour in her seeping juices.

Bringing his face to her, she licked away her scent off his lips, tasting herself, slimy tongues mingling, hungry, desperate, wanting more. This was just for starters, the night was going to be long. His rock hard cock, was eager for her attention

Lifting her off the bench she turned on the shower, and stepped inside. The cool water felt so good against her hot sweaty skin. She beckoned him to join her. Not wasting any time, stripping off, he immediately stepped in beside her and reached for her wet body, the kool water washing over both of them. Squeezing a generous amount of shower gel into her palms she proceeded to wash him everywhere, rubbing his skin, slightly scratching over his shoulders and back which gave him a sense of what was to come when they emerged. He did the same to her, soaping up her breasts and pussy, stirring her juices, feeling her, his expert hands all over her. It was time.

Slipping into fluffy large towels she took him by the hand and led him to her huge circular bed, with black satin sheets and aromatic scents wafting thru the air, subtle suggestive erotica hanging elegantly on the walls, the mood was right. The evening was just beginning!

Peeling off her towel, he laid her delicately onto the silky bedding and admired the voluptuous beauty before him. Months of waiting, agonising, anticipating was now finally a reality, and he couldn’t be happier.

Laying beside her, he watched her heaving breasts for a moment as she took deep breaths, her chest rising, her body slightly quivering, waiting for his touch, his love to engulf her, ravish her, as if her owned her. He reached for her huge ample boobs and slowly began stroking, tracing their shape, squeezing, teasing, looking at her in the eyes as he did so. She returned his stare, her eyes narrowing, her breath becoming soft pants, her whole groin area tingling. My love he whispered, tonight you will be under my spell, you are mine now, a desire I've had for a long time, the pain almost unbearable, till I held you here tonight.

Cradling her face in his hands, he parted her lips once again and deeply tongued her, his kissing stirring her folds, seeping slowly between her moist lips below. She eagerly responded by closing her eyes, losing herself, the passion so intense, urgent, letting him take her to a far away destination she was unsure of, yet totally submitting to. The headiness of his soft tongue caresses were driving her wild with abandonment, unleashing long lost passion she thought she'd never feel again, until she met him.

His kisses felt good, he didn’t hold back in making sure she felt them everywhere. Lips, cheeks, ears, neck, eyes, stomach, breasts, there was no stopping them, and she allowed herself to indulgue. Slowly, his tempo increased, as did his technique. She loved the way he would tease, nip, lick her and look for her reaction. Her moaning, and verbal use of his name frequently, spoke volumes, and made his cock even harder. He felt as if he was about to burst just by being with her, feeling her beside him, exploring her, but he had trained himself for this moment a long time ago. He wanted to please her, enjoy her, and that meant self control. It was damn hard, she made it so, but he did his best to hold back.

Pulling her on top of him, she straddled his chest, opening her thighs in his face, and let his tongue go to work on her again. Rubbing herself on his bristly chin, up and down, she closed her eyes dropping her head back and let out deep moans that delighted him. He wanted her scent on him, her taste in his mouth, and her moment of pleasure to wash over him. Licking his way inside her hot slit, he held her bare ass in his hands as he pushed her further and further into his eager face, her juices smothering him.

Her moans were filling the room, telling him to suck on her clit, as she looked down to watch him. He locked eyes with her, as her rigid love button disappeared between his lips, sucking her, twirling it around his tongue, feeling her tremble as she cried out with the most amazing shuddering orgasm that wouldn’t let up. Over and over the waves of pleasures radiating thru her, like electric current, pushing herself down onto him, as her spasms began. Holding open her lips, he was in awe as her inner drenched lips closed in in rythym, allowing her seeping delicious juices to flow into his open mouth. He drank her up, slurping her, using his tongue as you would a towel to completely lick her lips almost dry.

As her orgasm slowly subsided, her flipped her over down onto the bed face down and roughly spread her thighs. His cock was in agony, he needed to feel her from the inside, feel her heat, her walls closing in around him. He positioned himself between and slightly raised her hips off the bed. She looked like the norty girl he had visions of in his dreams, and now, here she was, all his, down on all fours and he was about to dip into the sweetest nectar honey pot.

Reaching down between her legs, turning her head slightly to look at him, she started rubbing her clit as he slid his massive throbbing pole along her burning hole, and over her swollen puffy lips. His teasing was too much, and she begged him to fuck her. He loved hearing that. Her sex was insatiable, wild, no woman has ever touched the core of his being like she had for a long time.

Finding her tight wet opening, grabbing his cock, he teased her with lil pushes of his thick head at the entrance, splicing her lips open then finally sinking his aching cock into the depths of her fiery inferno. Instantly, loud moans escaping his lips, drawing out then plunging in again. She felt so good, her walls squeezing tight around him, this was his moment. His moment to be selfish, demand of her, indulge her, use her as his toy. Again and again he repeatedly drove the entire length of his hard cock balls deep into her soaked snatch, his xxcitement building fast, listening to her filth, her pleasure, her wet pussy sounds. She submitted to him totally.

Grunting hard, he was fucking her hot slit good.

Grabbing her by her curvaceous hips, he steadied her as his tempo increased, along with his desperate moaning and heavy breathing. Her tight friction felt amazing, he knew she felt it too, when she yelled out she could feel every inch of his hard cock. Mmmm she was sooo norty. And he loved it.

His cock was about to unleash with every thrust, his throbbing building, tearing into her again and again like a beast possessed. Her screams mingling with his deep groaning. Fast approaching the point of no return. Where do you want me to cum he asked, slapping her round ass, continuing to pound into her. I want to taste you she responded, I want your hot cum all over my face and in my mouth. Mmmmm

His cock couldn’t handle it another second, she wanted him so much with her licking of her lips and sexy bedroom eyes. Thrusting, roaring, he pulled out and she quickly turned around between his legs as he shot his hot built-up load into her open awaiting mouth and all over her face.. His cum pumping out uncontrollably in huge spurts as she tasted him and let him cover her.

Licking his cum off her face, he shared it with her not missing a drop. Using his tongue to feed her, spread it all over her tongue and watched her swallow it all.

Yes their steamy night of lovemaking had just begun, they were both like a never-ending fire that never went out and they both needed more quelling. Laying in each others arms, bodies entwined, eyes locked, they kissed passionately both relishing in the afterglow, tho never allowing it to kool. Had she found her soulmate? both in love and sex? time would tell.

why the single woman wont commit

welcome to the noughties.

I hear it all the time, men moaning about there isnt women that are interested in commitment, family and stability. For the noughties women, commitment means compromise. Social climate change has brought to table, choices. For the modern woman, the social developments from the past 20 years has been phenomenal. Salaries have increased across the board, women are excelling more than ever academically giving access to more career choices and finanical stability.

With financial stability comes the ability to self sustain such a lifestyle, she has the opportunity to finance purchases like apartments, cars, investments, businesses. A new breed of female dominance has emerged. One that has the woman equate a commited relationship identical to giving something up.

She has moved beyond the helpless feeling of needing someone and is actively seeking a self-sufficient pro-creative lifestyle. As she moves onto her own independance, she develops an acute sense of taste and knows what she is looking for when it comes to dating material. She has grown tired of all the lame outdated dating advise. She sees a commited relationship as something that is not for keeps, a union that she selectively choose to compliment her rather than have her compromise.

However successful the modern woman, her biological clock is still ticking. There are plenty of career focused women opting not to have children and the ones that do have choices. It is clear that women will not compromise their lives for the sake of a relationship.

I don't have all the answers to this issue, but I do see that women are increasingly dominant in relationships, whilst the guys have simply lost their direction. Whilst a woman may want her man to act like a man, it is a man with conditions. It may not be that women can't commit, it may simply be that they don't have to anymore.

are you obsessed with finding a partner?

Just as "more of us are on diets than ever before but obesity rates are rising, something about dating is making us single.” (Times)

The rate of people choosing singledom has risen and doubled over the past 20 years or so. This, not so surprizingly, has been coupled by the increasingly popular use of speed dating, online dating and dating communities.

The primary goal of dating is to find and meet a suitable partner, however, as much as we know this, there are several pitfalls that make up "the problem of dating ettiquette" are you too focused on the "idea" of finding your perfect mate?

1) Dating

Dating is often seen as high pressured. We are constantly sizing up the physical, personality flaws, compatibility, habits, responses, over what really is important, like friendship and getting to know them. We think, because we do it, other daters will be making their judgements too about us. We cant relax enough, always feeling we have to be competitive, losing touch if we stop.

2) Problems with focusing on finding a partner

Finding a suitable partner is something we shouldnt be seeking to find, rather, to be open to and allow it to occur. It is something we shouldnt be desiring to acquire. Alasdair Macintyre calls it “networks of giving and receiving”. Relationships must be two way. If we go into a relationship systematically focused on what we’re going to get out of it, we’re setting ourselves up to fail from the start, we allow ourselves to equate the act of finding a partner as a matter of acquisition, a selfish calculation of costs and assets and what we can strive to benefit out of analysis. Theres no sense of sharing with the other person. Its as if being with someone, anyone really, is priority rather than cherishing the qualities of the relationship alone. Ask yourself honestly, where is the love there? We are more preoccupied with finding a partner than with nurturing the time of giving onself to the ideal investment of creating a warm, foundation-strong love and friendship.

3) So what is the solution?

Really, as obvious as it may sound, we should be affording our time with other people, getting to know them instead of looking. Our focus should primarily be on understanding, creating and nurturing friendships. We should be aiming to profoundly deepen and enhance those friendships, to evolve beyond the superficial shallowness phase. When time is spent developing this area, it is highly likely that, more often than not, positive relationships may result from this, therefore, we should view this as an additional positive benefit and not the primary focus.